


The traumatized are Unpredictable

by EndlessSkies64



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-01
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-07-19 12:27:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7361500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndlessSkies64/pseuds/EndlessSkies64
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will, continued staring at her, willing her to return his gaze. “You once told me the traumatized are unpredictable because we know how to survive. I never would’ve predicted this path for you. I never once considered you to be the type of person to wallow in self-harm and pity.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 0ne

He observed her drug and wine induced figure resting on the brown leather armchair near the window in the library of their temporary home in Florence.  
The silence of the cold room would’ve remained had he not reached his limit with her. “Why do you drink, Bedelia?” Will closed the distance between them, crowding her personal space. “No amount of rotted fruit will drown the demons embedded within the wall of your conscious.”

She raised the half empty crystal glass to her parted red lips. It was only after she polished off the glass that she deemed it suitable to reply. “There was a point when I considered myself in control of my conscious actions.” Her dilated pupils met his firm gaze evenly. There should have been at least the illusion of a supplicant before a towering figure, but Will knew that would be the last thing any observer would form the picture they made. The regal manner in which held herself contrasted against the idea. Even in her drugged state, she was above, the appearance and air of basic mortals, but weak to their poisons and habits. 

“I considered it a rare display of my practically nonexistent optimistic side.” Her voice was barely a whisper compared to his own, but the sound echoed throughout the room. The tone of her voice or perhaps it was her words and the meaning they held for him, made the scar on his cheek itch.

“I drink, Will, not to repress but to weaken myself for them. Sober I am fully aware of my actions, a pleasant buzz goes a long way.”

Will crossed his arms. “I assume the drugs hidden in the hollow book in your room take you further.”

She twirled the stem of the glass and broke their staring contest to look out the window. “Assume what you wish.” She raised her hand to wave him off, dismissing him like she would an annoying attendant. “Isn’t there some poor dog in need of your rescue?”

Will, continued staring at her, willing her to return his gaze. “You once told me the traumatized are unpredictable because we know how to survive. I never would’ve predicted this path for you. I never once considered you to be the type of person to wallow in self-harm and pity.” 

She returned her azure gaze back to his. “Every person has an intrinsic responsibility for their own life. This,” she raised the empty glass in her hand high above her head. “is how I survive.”

Will waved his hands in disgust over her form. “A half drugged, half-drunk existence is what you call survival, Bedelia?” 

The ice of her ice grew frigid as she rose slowly from the chair, bracing her hand against the leather arm. 

“What would you have me do? Would you have me embrace what Hannibal has persuaded out of the inner workings of our minds? Do you not think I didn’t enjoy the feeling of life and death within my grasp as I shoved my hand down the throat of my patient? A patient I was entrusted with and meant to help.” She laughed, her body shook with emotion. It was the most human Will had ever seen her. She looked wild, unstable and unspeakably radiant. He now understood why Hannibal wouldn’t dare part from her. 

“Power and ecstasy are fickle bitches, my twitchy little man. They last only as long as your mortality can remain silent. In the end, the moment of immortality I felt with his blood on my hand vanished as soon as it had come. In its place guilt and the constant restraint, I face my every waking hour took hold.” 

She closed the small distance between them. “I saw the baby bird and I crushed it. It was something that didn’t leave me unscathed, Will. You have your scar and I have mine.”

She pushed away from him. “The only difference is where we have them and how we choose to wear them. Your scar is upon your visage, cheek, like a badge for all to see. While mine is beneath the surface of my flesh, hidden and locked away. Safe from all, but me.” 

Bedelia retook her place on the chair. “Now if we're done with this mediocre intervention, leave so I may continue living in my drug induced existence and you in your brutal reality.”

Will left the room in search of Hannibal. Bedelia’s presence made his existence tolerable and Hannibal a little bit more human. He wouldn’t couldn’t allow her to continue on herself destructive path. She gave him hope once when he had none, her body pressed against the bars others wouldn't dare come near for fear of him, he would do the same.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The Wusthof classic cooking knife glinted as it sliced the mushrooms into pieces. The sound of the knife against the cutting board was broken once more by Hannibal's reply.

"I was unaware of your change in perspective, Will. I didn't know you held her in such high regard." He set the knife down on the counter and brushed the sliced mushrooms into a waiting bowl. 

Will, moved further into Hannibal's domain. Stopping near the counter, a safe distance away from the still glinting knife, he cleared his throat. "The similarities are far greater than the differences between us." Hannibal lowered the temperature on the stove and turned his body to face Will as he continued speaking.

"In the months since our hasty departure, I have found in her a confidant and a ... friend." 

A curious smile formed on Hannibal's. "Confidant? Friend? I once told her I saw the same in you. Do you know what she told me?"

His eyes crinkled at the corners as if he was savoring a particularly bitter wine. "You cannot function as an agent of friendship for a man who is disconnected from the concept as a man who is disconnected from the concept."

"All this time I believed you to be jealous of Bedelia."

Will cleared his throat once more, a faint blush highlighted the already prominent scar on his cheek. An image began to unravel in Will's mind. he saw Bedelia, then pretending to be Lydia Fell, and himself. The words falling from his tongue in the vivid memory, more bitter than any vinegar, couldn't be taken any other way. He'd felt jealousy, yes of that there was doubt. Things were different now... "Company, other than those I share a bed with is hard to find."

Hannibal chuckled. "I'm glad you are both getting along."

Will snagged his fleeting courage and repeated the statement he'd opened with when he first entered the kitchen. only, this time, he spoke it with the urgency it deserved.

"Bedelia is leaving us, Hannibal."

Hannibal gave him a condescending smile. "Don't be ridiculous, Will. Bedelia is aware of the consequences her flight would bring."

Will scratched the scruff on his cheek. "You would serve her as the main course in one of dinner parties."

Hannibal glared at him, the smile now gone from his face. "There was a time when I would've paired her with the most costly of bottles of wine and the rarest of ingredients."

"What changed?"

 

"When we found Bedelia, drugged and helpless, waiting to be cut... it changed my plans. When you know Bedelia for as long as I have... it is quite unbearable to see her as anything but a formidable adversary."

Will would've laughed, but the look on Hannibal's face warned him against it. "So it took seeing your formidable adversary almost cut to pieces by someone other than you to change your mind? You really are possessive, Hannibal."

He scratched his chin, fingers eager to scratch the scar. "What would you do if she left?"

Hannibal placed pearl onions on the cutting board. "There would be no place she could go where I would not be able to find her. She could leave if she desires to, but she will not find peace or happiness unless I can have mine." 

Will ignored the glinting knife and moved closer to Hannibal. "You would chase her to the ends of the earth, wouldn't you? You would run her down till she had no choice but to remain by your side."  
Hannibal continued to chop the onions, neither accepting or denying Will's claim.  
Will moved closer till only the air, teaming with energy, stood between them. "She is retreating, not to some country or island, but somewhere we will not be able to reach her. Somewhere you, in all the years you have known her, have not been able to enter. Not to say your efforts weren't effective, just lacking in attaining the entrance you desired."  
Will continued, ignoring the way the knife seemed to cut through the pearls with more force than necessary. 

"If we do not help her soon, she will be lost to us."

Hannibal swept the pearls into the bowl with the mushrooms. he reached for the carrots and began cutting them with gusto. 

"I reached you when you were in prison and afterwards when you were released."

Will shook his head. "Those are the differences between Bedelia and me. My bars were made iron and you have had access to my mind since the day we met. Bedelia's prison is her mind, a place no one is allowed other than the individual we speak of." 

Will watched as the knife sliced the carrots into fine little pieces. "She drinks and drugs herself-"

Hannibal swiped the carrots into the bowl and reached for a new ingredient to cut. "She is a doctor, Will. She does so in moderation."

"Have you looked at her lately. She is becoming the shell of the woman we once knew."

"She is happy. If she is happy she will stay."

The disgust etched onto Will's features matched the disbelief in his voice. "You would rather her in this state than one where she might decide to leave?"

Hannibal tossed the ingredients into the bowl, uncaring of the mess he made. "I will not her nor you."  
"If you don't help her, then you will lose her and in the process me. If I have to I will take her with me so she can get the help she needs."

Will stormed out of the kitchen and out the front door. His feet, as if knowing what he needed,took him to a nearby pet shelter.

 

Hannibal threw the food into the trash. The sight of the useless ingredients cut into a horrible mess only served to anger him further. removing his apron he left his sanctuary in search of Bedelia. 

The slouched woman in the chair near the window, nursing a glass of scotch couldn't be Bedelia. Had the happiness of having them both blinded him to her decorating state. 

He entered the room and removed the glass from her hands. It took her hazed mind longer than usual to realize he had taken her drink.

"What do you think you are doing?" she hissed with restrained hostility as she watched him remove the alcohol from the bar. 

"Helping."

Bedelia teetered on her high heels as she followed him to the kitchen where he placed all the wine and scotch in a cabinet past her reach. When he removed a small key from his pocket and proceeded to lock it Bedelia nearly lost all control. 

Stumbling from the room, she rushed into her room and shut the door. she was alone only for a moment before Hannibal entered and removed the drugs and bottle of vodka she had hidden in her closet behind her hat box.  
"Hannibal you can't do this, stop!" The cracking sound of her voice only strengthened Hannibal's resolve. He would help her get sober and reclaim the woman she once was.

"I'm doing this for your own good,Bedelia. I'm doing this to help you."

"To what end," she hissed as she gripped the door to her room. "other than your own."

The slamming of the door and breaking of glass did not stop him from searching the house for more drugs and alcohol. 

Later that night Hannibal glared at the small fluffy dog lounging on the Egyptian sheets of the king size bed.  
Will rubbed the small dogs stomach. "Who's a good girl? Who loves ya Bella?"

Hannibal reached for his book in an attempt to ignore them. "Where is Bedelia?"  
Hannibal opened his book to where he had left off the night before. "She is angry and refuses to come out of her room. I'm going to check on her when she has calmed down."

Will hugged Bella tightly. "She will go through withdraw."

"I know, but she will have our support. She will not go through this alone." 

 

Bedelia's hands shook as she stumbled into bed. She was so cold, her entire body was tingling and aching.  
Her trembling fingers couldn't even grasp the edges of her cover. giving up she curled up into a ball in the middle of her bed, still  
in the dress and shoes she'd worn earlier.

She didn't hear the door opening nor did she hear the sound of sweeping. She didn't hear the three bodies get on the bed but she did feel the warmth they brought. A large body hugged her from behind, possessive arms encircled her waist. A soft cover covered them as a  
lean body hugged her from the front in a comforting manner. A small mass of fur-bundled at her feet, providing warmth to her frozen toes. 

Bedelia trembled but the pain in her limbs began to recede as she fell into a deep slumber.


	3. chapter 3

Hot. Sweaty, sticky.... Why on earth was her bed so fucking hot? Bedelia opened her eyes, afraid to discover what predicament she would find herself in. 

She stifled a gasp when she saw not only one arm around her but two. There wasn't enough dry wine in the world to explain how she'd ended up in bed in Hannibal's possessive embrace. She could feel his soft breathing on her neck, moving her hair. The deliciously hallucinogenic drug, she kept hidden around their shared home, left her with enough self-awareness to know she would not allow dog loving Will Graham to cuddle her with his face nuzzled against her breasts. And nothing would ever tempt to let a dog near her. Especially not the little puff-ball curled at her feet. 

Apparently sober and drug-free, how was it she ended up in bed with them. Unable to bear their suffocating embrace, she slipped free of their hold as slowly as possible until she stood safely on the cold floor. The dog, to Bedelia's immense relief, did not bat an eye at her departure. The fur ball simply buried its nose and returned to its slumber. Bedelia shivered violently as she shut the door on the still sleeping and cuddling couple. 

For a moment, she considered crawling back into bed with them, but the thought vanished just as quickly as it appeared.

 

It was only after her attempt to free her beloved companions from the locked cabinet failed and after her search for her dear drugs came up empty, that Bedelia gave in to her grumbling stomach. Cursing Will and Hannibal to the darkest and most frigid pits in hell, she made her way to the kitchen and prepared herself a hearty meal with the bacon,eggs,sausage,pancakes, and jam Will bought from the market. The food Hannibal made him keep away from his fresh delicacies. 

She devoured half the plate before a sharp pain shot through her stomach. Bedelia clutched her stomach as the unbearable cramps continued. Standing from the table, she dumped the food in the trash and placed the plate in the sink. Her body trembled as she gripped the counter. The sound of the bedroom door opening and approaching footsteps set her into motion. 

Bedelia stormed past the previous occupants of her room, slamming the door shut before Hannibal could even voice a good morning. Locking the door Bedelia bolted for the bathroom. 

Dry heaves racked her body, but the contents in her stomach refused to leave their new domain. After what seemed like an hour, but in reality was less than three minutes, the heaves stopped as the merciless cramps continued. 

Trembling, she used the the the toilet to raise herself up. In a slow and steady manner, she stepped into the shower clothes and all. Even though she could feel sweat dripping down her back she didn't dare turn on the cold water. 

The scalding water poured over her for a good long while before Bedelia finally shut off the water. She shed the dripping clothing on the floor and wrapped her silk robe tightly around her shivering frame. 

The thin, red-faced woman in the mirror looked nothing like the formidable ice queen she'd stitched into the seams of her being. The stitchings of the once indifferent woman, now a wasted and trembling mess with dead eyes, were unraveling rapidly from her being. 

Turning away from the woman she'd become to live in the reality she'd been given, Bedelia stormed into her and stripped the sheets and cover off the bed that reeked of the men she loathed. Ignoring nausea and pulsing cramps, she grabbed a wool blanket from the closet. 

Bundled up in the middle of bed she closed her eyes not bothering to open them when she heard the door open or when she felt the bed dip.

"Bedelia?" Hannibal's voice soothed and irritated her scenes. "Can I do anything for you?"

Pleading with all gods and all the crushed birds in the world, she hoped her voice was steady. She opened her eyes and peered at the well dressed looking devil offering her comfort even though he'd already taken her soul. "You can stop treating me like a child, reign in that do-gooder and his dog, and return my things to me."

Hannibal's lip twitched. Bedelia wondered if it was a smile or a snarl he repressed. "I can't give you what you ask. Will and I are trying to help you."

"Those in need of help are offering it. How generous of you both."

She shut her eyes and missed the smile playing on Hannibal's lips.


End file.
